Words #8

It was true that I wasn’t the best candidate for the crown, but I didn’t deserve to be in the running at all if I couldn’t at least be brave enough to confess how I felt.

I sighed, trying to keep my voice steady. “I don’t want to leave all this.”

“If I remember correctly, the first time we met, you said it was like a cage.” He smiled. “It does grow on you, though, doesn’t it?”

I gave my head a small shake. “Sometimes you can be so stupid.” A weak laugh pushed through my choked-up throat. Maxon let me pull away just enough so I could look into his brown eyes.

“Not the palace, Maxon. I could care less about the clothes or my bed or, believe it or not, the food.” Maxon laughed. It was no secret how excited I had been about the extravagant meals here.

“It’s you,” I said. “I don’t want to leave you.”

“Me?”

I nodded.

“You want me?”

I smiled, continuing to study the floor.

“And if you don’t get to be princess then, so what? 

That doesn’t make you any less incredible. And you know

… you know …” He couldn’t get out what he wanted to 

say, and I risked looking at his face.

In Aspen’s eyes I saw a thousand different endings to 

that sentence, all of them connecting him to me. That he 

was still waiting for me. That he knew me better than 

anyone. That we were the same. That a few months at the 

palace couldn’t erase two years. No matter what, Aspen 

would always be there for me.

“I know, Aspen. I do.”

“What’s it like to be in love?” May asked. Part of me ached. Why hadn’t she ever asked me? Then I remembered, as far as May knew, I’d never been in love. Lucy’s smile was sad. “It’s the most wonderful and terrible thing that can ever happen to you,” she said simply. “You know that you’ve found something amazing, and you want to hold on to it forever; and every second after you have it, you fear the moment you might lose it.”

“America, there’s no question that 

you’ve had my heart from the beginning. By now you have

to know that.” 

When he brought his eyes up to mine, I could see it in 

every part of him and feel it in every piece of me. 

“I do.”

“But what you do not have right now is my trust.”

I was stricken. “What?”

“I’ve shown you so many of my secrets, defended you 

in every way I can. But when you aren’t pleased with me, 

you act rashly. You shut me out, blame me, or, most 

impressively, try to change the entire country.”